He was rather cold when he said goodbye, and I was surprised to notice that I felt a little hurt. This was the only time during the session when I felt "dirty" about what I'd done.
I felt he was judging me. I made a conscious decision not to let this bother me: I probably wouldn't see him again, and it was just a business transaction, so it didn't really matter what he thought about me. I would offer this advice to clients, though: You're not the only one who has feelings about what just happened.
In my post-university slump, I felt like my life was in the drain. Now that I was in a new city, the area strip clubs were more plentiful. I went to one "audition". The girls were snorting coke in the dressing room, and the bouncers seemed more malicious and oversexed than the customers. I did not go back.
I remembered a roommate I had in university who signed up as an escort through an online service. I drove two hours to his house, white-knuckled in anticipation of what I was about to do.
He was middle aged, pretty average-looking — balding, in OK shape. I don't want to seem flippant when I talk about the sex. There was nothing special about it except for the fact that it was the first time in my young life that I was literally prostituting myself. In retrospect, my opinion of prostitution is that it is fine if you have straightened it out in your head as to why you are doing it and what you get out of it, but you are risking your safety and your health.
Can you charge a price high enough to compensate for that? And the sex was nothing I remember anything about.
He left his television muted on CNN the whole time. My biggest concern was that I had very little experience and that it would show I had only had sex a couple of times in my life. My next worry was that I would not be able to fill a full two hours with sexual entertainment. It was not that hard. Most people are easy enough to talk to, and once the sex is over it is just pillow talk and back rubs.
After two months, I started scheduling dates with men and then not showing up. I was starting to get real about why I was having sex with men for money. I had been feeling rejected by a former lover, and I was angry about being in debt and was discovering that my university degree was essentially worthless.
I felt like being destructive. My last job scared me out of it for good. He was a short bald man with a big spare tyre and smelled of cigarettes. He asked if he needed to wear a condom about half of the men asked this.
I put the condom on him, and then he spun me around and pushed me up against the dresser. The force of this manoeuvre was unexpected. He tried to get me to have anal sex, and I had to struggle to avoid it. It was starting to feel more like a violation than a situation that I was in control of. It was a wake-up call, though. I have always had confidence in my physical strength and my wits to keep myself safe, but just a small taste of how quickly I might get overcome if I wasn't on my guard was what made me decide to quit.
I was a year-old virgin when I first visited a prostitute. I've always been shy and a bit of a computer geek, and somehow I missed out on opportunities at school and university that might have got my sex life off to a start. Once I graduated I ended up in an IT job, full of other single male geeks. It was only when I hit 30 that I started to worry about the other things missing from my life.
At that point, my age and lack of experience were a major worry. I was tempted by online dating, but knew that anyone I might meet would be more sexually experienced than me, and this became a major stumbling block.
Websites and forums are what I do, and mostly how I interact with other people, so it didn't take me long to find forums devoted to escort work.
I researched diligently, read up on the pros and cons, and the dangers, health and otherwise, of seeing escorts. The escorts posting sounded genuine, even relatively normal, and not the junkies I'd expected. I made up my mind to go for it. It was still nearly a year before my first experience.
I chose a more mature woman, as I felt it would be easier, somehow, to confess my inexperience to her. My performance was as you might expect from a first-timer, but she was sympathetic and understanding.
She didn't clock-watch, and I enjoyed her company as much as the sexual activity. I left with a feeling of relief that I'd got it over with, that I was no longer a virgin.
After that, I found other girls local to me. I've had some fantastic experiences and none of the girls have fitted the mould of trafficked eastern Europeans or drug addicts.
There was the single mum of 19, who was saving to put herself through a college course to get a professional qualification and she did, successfully, and gave up escorting to take a less-well-paid job in her chosen field. There was the swinger, who had decided that if she was going to do it anyway, she might as well get paid for it. Overall, more of the experiences have been good than bad.
Most of the girls have been intelligent and good company and I put that down to the amount of effort I put in to selection. I'm generally very careful about who I choose; the less successful experiences have always come when I rushed a decision.
My plan was for a short-term fix, a start towards a normal life and a way of catching up with experiences I should have had 10 years ago. It's worked so well, that it's becoming a lifestyle choice. I think I prefer it this way. The more comfortable they feel around you, the more they can enjoy their work. Being clean is a big turn on for escorts.
Women like guys when they just got out of the shower. All women like candle light. Escorts are no exception. True love is just one style of having sex. There are many other styles. Just because you're not in love doesn't mean it's not personal and intimate. Women instinctively like sex and want to have orgasms. All you have to do is allow her instincts to do the job. Always make sure there is sufficient lubrication.
Pain is a distraction from sexual enjoyment. Make sure you're not crushing her or cutting off blood flow do to awkward positions. Give her room to position herself correctly so that she's comfortable. Women will give you clues as to what they want next. All you have to do is watch for the clues. Relationships with escorts can last for decades and a regular relationship can be fulfilling on many levels other than just sex.
There are lots of prudes from Christians to Feminists who want the government to intrude into your private sex life in order to convince themselves they are morally superior. Support those who openly resist government controlled sex. Divorce laws in the United States are very hostile towards marriage and families. As long as we allow our courts to be used by crooked lawyers as tools to steal everything you have, the use of escort services will continue to rise.
Never say the words "sex for money" or make that agreement verbally....